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When Someone You Love Deconstructs Their Faith
This post is outside of my normal audience. Typically I’m writing to people who are deconstructing, rethinking faith, or trying to reconstruct their faith after religious trauma and spiritual abuse. Today I am writing to the people who love them and are concerned for them. Hello there! Because those of you who will hopefully find this post are probably unfamiliar with me and my story, let me give a quick background. I spent the 90s in a Christian cult with my family. It was a conscious decision my parents made because they truly thought they were doing the best thing. Although they were always a bit skeptical and tried to…
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I’m Just Here for the Broken Ones
My grandpa loved burnt cookies. That last pan that got forgotten in the oven, the extra crispy ones with the hard brown edges that no one else wanted to eat, those were his favorites. When my grandparents came to visit, he always had the same question for my mom. “Got any burnt cookies?” At first I thought he was joking or just trying to make my mom feel better if she’d burnt any. But as I grew up, I realized that my grandpa was actually serious. One of thirteen siblings, his mom was just a little busy and burnt cookies were often the result. Strangely, Grandpa not only got used…
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Confessions of a Former Pharisee
I used to be a Pharisee. One of those well-meaning religious people who totally missed God walking in front of them because they were so consumed with rules and spirituality. Yup, that was me. And it wasn’t just back in my days in a cultic sub-group of Christianity. Honestly, I was a Pharisee up until a few years ago. I can still be a Pharisee right now. I’ve been that religious person who only cares about people cleaning the outside of their cup and whitewashing their tombs. (Matthew 23:25-28) The one who wants you to fix your behaviors while missing your hurting heart. God used four teenage girls in leggings…
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But First We Are People
We recently took our kids to Chicago for a quick weekend. I’m not a city girl, not by a long shot, but I do like a good adventure. My husband is also pretty willing to take a chance. So, after finding a great deal on a hotel north of the city, we decided to take the Metra train into Chicago for the day and then use buses to travel around. It seemed like a good idea. We weren’t exactly familiar with public transportation, but how hard could it be? Almost impossible actually. Buying our train tickets online was a breeze. Getting onto our train and traveling into Chicago was exciting.…
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Learning from People I Thought I Disagreed with…
About a month ago, I set out on a journey of learning and discovery through reading. You know what I’ve discovered so far? I’m kind of a jerk. Good to know, huh? 😉 When I first started my book proposal a couple of years ago, there were three books somewhat contemporary to mine that totally irritated me. Not that I’d ever read them, mind you. But I knew (or thought I knew) the conclusions the authors came to and I disagreed with them. These women had all become disillusioned with evangelical Christianity and were looking for something different. They had significant followings. It irritated me. Prideful much? In my last…
