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Shiny Happy People and the Church
This was originally published in my Substack Newsletter – Rethinking Faith I finished Shiny Happy People last week with my husband. It was a glimpse into my life for him and a difficult reminder for me. Some of the episodes were harder to watch than others. Unexpected emotions, pieces of memories, and a looming sense of dread welled up in ways I didn’t expect. I had to stop and explain, process, and breathe. (Episode 160 of my podcast was my response) As hard as it was to watch, it was also validating. I’ve been saying to people for years that I think Gothard has had more influence on Evangelical Christianity than we…
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When Someone You Love Deconstructs Their Faith
This post is outside of my normal audience. Typically I’m writing to people who are deconstructing, rethinking faith, or trying to reconstruct their faith after religious trauma and spiritual abuse. Today I am writing to the people who love them and are concerned for them. Hello there! Because those of you who will hopefully find this post are probably unfamiliar with me and my story, let me give a quick background. I spent the 90s in a Christian cult with my family. It was a conscious decision my parents made because they truly thought they were doing the best thing. Although they were always a bit skeptical and tried to…
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The Tapestry of Faith
Apparently I’ve become a different kind of writer lately. I wrote another poem thing almost two months ago while listening to The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill podcast by Christianity Today. I originally shared it on Instagram, but it feels fitting to share it here as well. The start of Season Five of my podcast, Looking for the Real God, is all about faith deconstruction. I quoted this on the podcast today as I reminded my listeners that it is possible to deconstruct our beliefs without deconverting from the historical Christian faith. More than anything I know that Jesus is Real. But I also know that we have messed…
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The Flawed Theology of Christian Nationalism
Families traveled to the nondescript hall each week from across Michigan and even Ontario. Some drove up to two and a half hours one way — my family drove an hour and twenty minutes — to gather on Sunday with like-minded believers. The hall was split into two areas: one lined with tables where families set up their lunch spot, and the other with rows of old metal folding chairs gathered in a semi circle around an electric piano and a black, collapsible podium. In the back of the room near the kitchen, they set up PVC pipes with curtains as a space for the nursing mothers and babies. There…
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The Awkward Middle Way
When my friend Rachel invited me over to her family’s fall harvest party I had no idea I’d be running into people from my past. Or that there would be an awkward stare down over the bonfire. Although Rachel and I had both grown up under the influence of the same cultic organization, her family had been on the fringe and missed a lot of the craziness I experienced. Still, we had a bunch of mutual friends. Something I unfortunately forgot. I hadn’t seen these people in at least five years and let’s just say a lot had changed. For me that is; they looked exactly the same from their…
